Hell No

Well November seemed to pass in a blur and I notice with shock and horror that my post count stands at precisely zero.In all fairness to myself I wrote the below article in yet another fit of frustration and figured I would sit on it as it was bound to upset some people (crazy restraint I know) but also because I have stepped up in my writing commitment to The Sleeping Shaman lately (well Lee might say otherwise but I feel I have been turning in a decent wadge in the past couple of months) and thought maybe it was time to take writing about music a bit more seriously for my own sake as opposed to bitching about the state of metal.

That said I had a long chat with my man Ollie from Grifter in the last week and came to the conclusion that it isn't that I'm beginning to hate metal, it is in fact that I love it so much that the banal and the mediocre state it is in that would allow things such as a Coal Chamber to happen makes me massively angry. In truth in order to get some reward from the genre it is necessary to look beyond the mainstream - I have reviewed so much quality music for the Shaman this year that I penned an end of year overview without hesitation and yet my later to be unveiled Good, The Bad & The Ugly 2012 has been like pulling teeth despite the fact I have listened to a shitload of music this year.

With that in mind, I felt I would air this article, the idea of filling a void with something that is a pale imitation was very much behind this when I wrote it and still rings true now.

Without further ado:



Now this isn't a missive about the current WWE Tag Team Champions, it's not even about the Brokeback pseudo cowboy musical mess that currently occupies the day jobs of Vinnie Paul, Chad Grey and a couple of others from Mudvayne and Nothingface.



No, this is about the frequent press spoutings from pinch harmonic abusing, homeless stunt double and extended Osbourne family member Zakk Wylde about a possible Pantera Reunion with him on guitar.
Since being fired/sacked/kindly asked to step aside from making every single Ozzy Osbourne album of the last decade sound like the left over from a Black Label Society studio session, wannabe biker Zakky boy has taken to extolling how honoured he would be to play with Phil, Vinne and Rex to honour his 'brothers' memory.




Now there is no doubt that Zakk and Dime were friends by the time of his death the fact is there seems to have been a little artistic license granted in light of the In This River debacle.
In This River first appeared on the BLS album Mafia in 2005. The common misconception is that it was written as a tribute to the fallen axeman, when in fact it was actually written some months before the terrible incident.
Upon learning of Dime's death Wylde dedicated the song to his friend. This dedication would extend to the video in which a pseudo Wylde and Darrell would be depicted as childhood friends playing together.
This apparent airbrushing of history (as neither Dime or Vinnie knew Wylde as children, or until they were supporting Ozzy Osbourne) seems to have lead to this myth that if there is one man who could step onto the stage in Abbott's place it is the BLS mainman, something he has been keen to exploit in the press at every opportunity.

Now let's have it right, I miss Pantera incredibly - they were a band who effected me a great deal as a teenager, I will admit to shedding tears at 26 years of age upon learning of his death. I was fucking devastated and whilst Metal rolls on I do strongly believe the scene is not only missing a valuable headliner, but an innovator, a pioneer and a genuine star of the scene.
For all the arguments, the ugly break up, the patchy last album, three ring circus of a tour and the refusal to leave America following 9/11, I do genuinely believe that if Phil Anselmo had removed his head from his ass and the Abbott brothers had calmed down then Pantera would be together today making music to set this scene alight.
Nathan Gale destroyed that chance and I am afraid it is gone.



The net result is that Vinnie Paul understandably hurts at the loss of his actual brother and naturally the ill will of this fallout lands on the man who suggested in the press that Dimebag should be beaten severely and, as someone who has a long memory for wrongs committed against him, I understand completely.
Anselmo for his part has always been a mouthy dick. He stopped giving interviews in the nineties because of journalists twisting his words and has been accused of racism due to misinterpretation of an on stage drunk rant about 'black on black crime' and at the time he gave the Metal Hammer interview in question he was smacked off his tits on painkillers and/or heroin depending on who you listen to and frankly shouldn't have been held responsible for balling socks yet alone speaking coherently on the sensitive subject of the demise of his former band.

Since the tragic death of Dimebag, Phil has grovelled publicly about how sorry he was if his actions played any part in influencing Gale to go on his rampage, he has cleaned up his act and thrown himself head long into numerous projects including his own solo album which is due to see the light of day soon, the New Orleans supergroup Down, Arson Anthem and his label Housecore Records to name just a few and even managed to make peace with Rita Haney, Dimebag's long time girlfriend.

However what has not happened is gaining forgiveness from Pantera's other founding member.

In the interim Rex Brown who accompanied Anselmo for two Down releases, 2002's A Bustle In Your Hedgerow and 2007's Over The Under, was given an ultimatum when the band regrouped to begin the follow up recordings to clean himself up.
Fellow Down members Jimmy Bowyer, Kirk Windstien, Pepper Keenan and Anselmo had all spent serious time before and after the devastation of Hurricane Katrina battling various addictions and it seems Brown's were not good for the productivity of the band.
Sadly this seems not to have been able to work out and Crowbar's Pat Bruders has replaced him on Bass duties - Anselmo claiming that they had tried to help him but he needed to go sort himself out.
Rex himself came out in the press stating he 'was in the doghouse' with Anselmo.
He has since emerged in Kill Devil Hill, an Alice In Chains sounding band featuring former Black Sabbath drummer Vinnie Appice.

Following the demise of post Pantera Abbott vehicle, Damageplan Vinnie Paul understandably took time to return to the live stage having witnessed his brother and the person he had played with his entire life murdered in front of him, he eventually returned with the aforementioned Hellyeah.
Having released a solid debut the Texan and his wannabe Cowgirls from Illinois have sadly released two more albums in the form of Stampede and this years utterly charmless Band Of Brothers.
He has also maintained his stance of refusing to speak to Anselmo, going so far as banning him from the funeral and kept his distance from Rex who was perceived to have sided with Phil in the Pantera split, not to mention falling out with Rita Haney since she made her peace with them both.

So what has this got to do with a reunion?
Well everything, never mind Zakk fucking Wylde. Never mind that every time he comes out in the press about it Anselmo comes out and denies it - the past couple of weeks have been like the build up to Slipknot doing something with the Clown coming out and saying they are going to take their time, Corey coming out and saying he doesn't know if there will be another release and then Joey coming out and saying they have demoed 18 tracks and are raring to go.

The fact is that it would take a fucking miracle to get the three remaining members of Pantera in a room together, yet alone on stage.
And to what end?
Because metal is so shit these days that we need this?
This would not be Pantera, at best it would be a tribute to Dimebag.
Well there have been plenty of those - I would be more moved the next time I see Machine Head dedicate Aesthetics of Hate to him. Again. 
I feel strongly enough that Black Sabbath tote around under the name without the man who kept time for them and he's alive!
Dimebag is dead, he was brutally murdered, no matter how bad you feel or how much you miss him, having Zakk friggin Wylde up there isn't going to make it better.
In fact why even Zakk Wylde?
He was never a thrash guitarist, he never will be - I can see him now legs akimbo with his Les Paul screeching horribly as he mangles Darrell's solos.
Gay Holt would be a far better choice if you really had to.
Christ get a fucking hologram.
Oh wait, him and Dime were such good friends…
Riiight.

The fact is this 'reunion' shouldn't even be about the guitarist.
It would be about the remaining members of Pantera being allow to mourn/celebrate their band, together.
It would mean far more for Phil, Vince and Rex to sort their issues and be in the same room for the first time since it happened.
For me they don't ever have to step on stage.



Dime is dead.
You can't replace him, as a musician, as a performer, as the heart and soul of Pantera, yet alone an incredible guitarist.
I saw Pantera and I saw Damageplan; to suggest replacing him sullies the memory.

Go watch a DVD folks, no one wanted to see Queen with Adam Lambert.
Zakk Wylde can go jump In This River.

Since I penned the original part of this entry Vinnie Paul has come out in the press and stated that this will never happen. Please let him hold true to this statement.