Getting Lost in the Spotlight

By now if you inhabit the rock world and don't know of the hideous case of Ian Watkins then your world must actually be one of rock, as you would have had to be very fortunate or have been living under a stone to not have heard that the former Lostprophets singer had pleaded guilty to 13 counts of sex offences this week, including two charges of conspiracy to 'rape a baby'.
Yes. That's right folks, just let that sink in a moment.
If your skin doesn't crawl at the thought you have a stronger constitution that most people.

Last year I signed off by commenting about my personal view on the man, but in the spirit of 'innocent to proven guilty' it would be a very tabloid thing to have made a presumptive leap and put the boot in.
Well now here's my opportunity…
And to be honest I don't have the stomach for it.
Lostprophets and I go way back (not in too close a way) which may come as a surprise to some who read this regularly but it's true.

Back when I was at University I was, even then, a fierce champion of the British Metal scene. I was lucky enough to be regularly going to gigs when the likes of Therapy? Pitchshifter, Raging Speedhorn, Johnny Truant, Jet Pack and Floor (who became Hundred Reasons), Breed 77 (okay they are from Gibraltar), Feeder, One Minute Silence, Sikth, Earthtone9, Murder One, Iron Monkey, Kill II This… I could go on, were high profile and touring a lot. Through Exeter's Cavern club came a virtual cavalcade of decent bands at least once a month where you could go along even if you weren't that into the headliner and be guaranteed of a ass kicking band on the bill.
It was through such endeavours that I got to know Mark Mynett of Kill II This - I didn't know him well to be fair, I'm not claiming we were buds, but he would recognise my face and always make time to catch up. I know plenty of people who will talk smack about him now, but he was always a decent guy to his fans.

So rewind to a gig circa 2000 and Mark is outside on Queens Street unloading K2T gear and naturally we went over and started to chat with him. After a short while he broke off and checked the time, before telling us we had to go and watch the opening act Lost Prophets as they were going to be 'the next big thing'. Curious by this statement we went and checked them out crammed onto the tiny stage and you know what?
They were fucking great.

I appreciate not everyone liked Nu Metal despite the purpose it served at the time, and some people vehemently dislike the idea of turntables in rock etc but that evening the Pontypridd band were on fire, you could feel something special happening around them.
Sure there were moments that weren't stellar - like the singer speaking in an America accent but they really were riding a wave at that point.
We hung out with them after the show; for those who don't know LP actually started as a side project of a couple of the band members who were in a hardcore band called Public Disturbance and fancying myself as a punk/hardcore affection ado at the time I did know a little about the band and enough to talk to them about it.
The majority of them were pretty cool actually - Lee Gaze, Mike Lewis and in particular DJ Jamie Oliver (not the fat tongued lisping Mockney food burner). I could embellish the story saying Watkins was off chasing underage skirt, but the fact was if he did it wasn't noticed. He was just a bit quiet, an aloof cunt if you want the brutal truth, but then he's a singer and we were drunk, sweaty blokes basically trying to fan boy a band so we could stay later and drink more. I would have fucked me off too at that point.



However that is not how the story went and we ended up taking them around Exeter and in particular to KFC, but I bought the Visible Noise version of FakeSoundOfProgress (the version regarded by the band as a demo) and got it signed by all of them.
Next time they came back to the Cavern they had serious critical mass behind them, there was a buzz on the UK scene about them, the place was sold out.Watkins sneered from the stage that night in his irritating faux accent that they 'were going to be the biggest band in the world'.
You could almost believe him at that point.
We chatted again to the same guys from the band we had gotten on well with the time before  - obviously harder to do now and they were excited but still lovely guys and we all left happy campers.

Then for me something seemed to go a little wrong.
Metallica's management group Q Prime stepped in and acquired the band, a sure fire ticket to fame.
They remixed FakeSoundOfProgress to give it a more 'America appeal' and re-released it, destroying the sound of it for me, the shit radio rock version of a moment of lightning captured in a bottle. A simple and effective cover now clogged up with dumb fucking Transformer images (before that was big again) and just a product so far away from what it once was that it seemed like a betrayal to all of us who had shelled out for it in it's rough cut form.
It stripped the band of any homegrown charm - I know the band have struggled to grasp the concept over the years as to why a section of their previously rabid support turned on them in such a vicious way, but at the time it felt like a slap in the face to the people who got them noticed.
You are not good enough as fans, this is the audience we are chasing.
So yeah, fuck you very much good night Lost Prophets - sorry Lostprophets now.

Well not quite, I did catch them on the main stage at Ozzfest in 2002. It was nice in some ways to see the little band get so big - I sang along deliberately and unintentionally out of tune (I was plastered) mocking Watkin's America vocals and trying to spot Faye Tozer to no avail.
After this came the stories of being flown to the States to be wooed by major labels. One particularly story which I am sure is common place, but not often reported is that one label splashed out on over $900 of tattoo work for the singer to get a really gay looking pair of Baz Lurman Romeo & Juliet style pistols on his hips.

After that it was a case of Americanising up the band - Jamie Oliver was moved from turntables to keyboards (as Nu Metal started to fall from favour) and sophomore album Start Something was released.
To be fair to Q Prime their strategy worked and the band's mainstream popularity exploded with the likes of Burn Burn and Last Train Home all over the airways.
Now it really was fuck you and goodnight for me.
You could argue at this point that I was being an elitist scenester and the band who no longer fit in my pocket were now too big and not 'the band I took to KFC' so therefore I turned my back on them.
Maybe there is a touch of smoke on that fire, but frankly I couldn't stand the album I did like once they 'realised their vision for it' and truthfully, hand on heart, the band they became I would rather take a fucking drill to my ear than listen to.
Given the still vitriolic stance of the metal scene towards them (even before this sad turn of events) I can safely say I wasn't alone.
But whatever, the reality is my opinion only really counts to me and the the band had sold to date 3.5 million records and were poised to go on to become global headliners with their next album release, like it or not.

Fast forward to the sad events of this week and the band are in ruins.
Watkins, if the truth be told, has copped to just enough to satisfy the prosecution that they can avoid a long and harrowing trial whose details will not help further condemn those involved or heal the victims. All you can do is hope that it only ever got as far as conspiracy.
Having split up in the months leading up to the trial the remaining band members have acknowledged that they cannot continue with the name as forever the association of Watkins crimes will hang over them.
Indeed it seems true as the Lostprophets have been labelled a 'pedo band' despite the fact that only one member was guilty of these heinous acts, but then this highlights the idiocy prevalent on social media as even lame children's entertainer Ian H Watkins of Steps fame has had to step off twitter as he has faced a barrage of outraged people abusing him for crimes he hasn't committed.
Still its probably the only thing that could get him back in the news…
News broke today that HMV was pulling all of the bands back catalogue from it's shelves in all 140 over priced stores.

George Davison the LP tour manager of 12 years issued the following emotional statement that sums up better than most the emotion involved in the demise of the band.

YOU THINK YOU KNOW SOMEONE BUT YOU REALLY DON’T.
From 2001 – 2012 you trust in a person amongst a group of great people and the day comes when you are shown the true nature of a person.
Its easy to just to brush away and try to forget the last 12 years of knowing Ian.
That’s not going to happen to me or for the others that thought we knew him.
We lived and breathed the same space together intensely for a long time and I would have NEVER predicted that this would have happened.
We rode the wave of success together, all of us coming from humble backgrounds to flying around the world together.
All experiencing the rush of seeing exotic places for the first time, meeting your rock n roll heroes, relentless touring, marriages, births & deaths together.
Its a bond that for some is a fleeting, transient experience. Jumping from one band to another.
For me it wasn’t like that, at least with Lostprophets it was never like that for me.
I will never forget my times with this band. The Good, the Bad and now this the Ugly.
The Ugly truth that Ian let us all down, his family, band mates, friends and fans across the world.
I feel right now so angry, astonished and pissed off with him for what he did.
I feel so sorry for his victims, the children he abused. I only hope those children can grow up without the taint of what he did to them clouding their futures.
I would never attempt to excuse anything he did as I firmly believe he made his choices and now he will pay for them.
Do I feel sorry for the accused woman and Ian?
Right now, I don’t feel sorry for them at all. They were all complicit in allowing these horrific acts to happen.
I don’t care how many drugs you have taken there is no excuse or reason for even contemplating, let alone carrying out what they did to those children.
These people are sick and need help. I believe in the idea of forgiveness, and the goodness in people.
It’s impossible to see any good in this situation except for fact that they were caught and therefore won’t abuse those children anymore.
It’s hard to forgive them for this.
Whether you knew him personally or just reading about this for the first time. How can you forgive someone for these crimes against the very innocent?
My thoughts also keep going to his family and bandmates. The future for all of them will be forever tarred with the memory of this betrayal.
The fans will move on, taking down their posters, throwing out their LP albums and looking for the next rock saviour to admire.
For his family and band it will be with them forever.
My heart goes out to them all and their families. Lest we forget all those people come from a tight knit, proud and loving place.
For them the shame will be something they will have to live with until they die.
I however refuse to forget the great people, the great times and experiences I had with Lostprophets.
The way they and their families welcomed me into their lives to help facilitate their dreams of becoming rock stars.
Something they achieved where so many others had failed.
Its something that can never be taken away from them. True the band is done, finished.
Life goes on though. Everyone involved in Ian will move on, but today with a very heavy heart.
I will never forget these events until the day I die. Its been an emotional day for me.
Who would have ever thought it would have ended up like this!!!!!! F**K!!!!”

And this is probably where I stand with it; I feel sad and angry.
I have a great deal of sympathy for the remainder of the band who have been robbed of their livelihoods and any future earnings by a man who some where along the way turned into a twisted, vile and repulsive excuse for human life.
I didn't like the band in the end but for a moment our lives crossed and the rest of the band and those associated with it are people like you and I. Real people with lives and feelings that are now intractably linked to the actions of this cunt of a man.
I don't need to add colourful hyperbole to let you know what I think of him - if you have read the extended case notes, Christ even if you have just read the bare minimum and aren't physically repulsed by the actions of the man and these two women then I suggest you have a word with yourself.
But the stain will never go away and if there is one thing in this day and age that people should be mindful of, particularly those in bands and in the public light, that this isn't the seventies, there is a global media spotlight on you.
You should probably think about your actions.

A few years ago I went to see a well known band play in the Lemongrove in Exeter. It was a great show, I had my CDs with me to get signed. After the show I waited with everyone else on the barrier hoping to catch the band after their set.
As the room was clearing, a security guard for the band came along and selected people to meet them. His job it seemed was to fuck off anyone who didn't resemble the Corpse Bride's slutty daughter.
Was I annoyed by this? A little, I will be honest, but I was not alone there were plenty of other dudes or older women there too and all of us not looking jailbaity were dismissed. When it was clear that one of the girls not selected had friends who were backstage one of the band came out and collected her, ignoring the rest of us patiently waiting.
After another five minutes stood there I left feeling more than a little uneasy about the whole thing.
I get it, you tour the world, you have shit conditions for transport, accommodation, food, sometimes venues, you are tired and human etc, the last thing you want when you come off stage is a dude who is probably going to tell you he preferred your older stuff, but the perception I left with that night was not a good one.
I'm not suggesting that anything happened, but if a story had hit the papers in the weeks afterwards it wouldn't have surprised me in the slightest and truthfully knowing the band members age (public eye boys, public eye) it made my fucking skin crawl.

The there is the band Blood On The Dance Floor.



Now I can't really comment musically about a band on a metal blog who are basically not metal without having more than a (usually) swing of bias and not only do they sound like 100% Cancerous Ear Aids, but a band who primarily seem to play to an audience of little girls should not (in my opinion) be churning out lyrics like:
Got a montser in my pants,
And if I ever get the chance,
Gonna cram it down your throat,
Watch you gasp for air and choke.
I'm gonna jizz all in you're face!
I'm gonna wreck this fuckin' place!

Now that may come across as prudish but we seriously have a problem these days with letting kids be kids. Everyone has a smartphone, a social media account and are open to abuse.

Wikipedia (which I appreciate isn't always the most reliable source) has a summation of BOTDF's singers alleged misdeamours:
Dahvie Vanity, the founding member of Blood on the Dance Floor, is widely accused of child molestation. His first publicly known offense arose in 2009 where Vanity was convicted for having sex with a minor and went on trial for it within the year 2010. In 2011, a petition to ban Blood on the Dance Floor from playing Warped Tour 2011 started before that summer began because of parents' concerns with Vanity's repeated reputation of sexual abuse to children. A Tumblr page located at http://truthaboutdahvie.tumblr.com/ includes "dozens of submissions from self-described ex-fans of the duo, support acts and crew members has been published, all of which recall past experiences with BOTDF member Dahvie Vanity and many of which relate to under-age sexual activity or some other form of sexual harassment from the ‘musician’."
In 2010, pop music artist Jeffree Star raged on social networking site Twitter about his experience with being around Dahvie Vanity, he made tweets such as:
"I no longer support Blood on the Dance Floor and how disgusting Dahvie is. Touching children and enjoying the attention is evil. Fuck off sicko. If you support that piece of shit then unfollow me because you're supporting child molestation. Dahvie is the lowest worthless scum I've ever met.
Being on tour with that child fucker has made me see the truth. I regret ever doing a song with that pig. RIP because you'll never be me. I'm gonna speak the truth 'til I die, we saw Dahvie bring under-age girls to his hotel rooms and do sexual things. 100% ILLEGAL."

Now I have read that Tumblar page until I couldn't actually take anymore and the attitude of this particular oxygen thief?
You can talk your shit you’re only makin' me famous - Bitches Get Stitches

I'm probably straying way off music here and into social commentary, which I try to avoid as when it's on the internet nobody reads it properly, doesn't properly form an argument in response and all of a sudden we're sharing videos about Joseph Kony thinking we're saving Africa.

My point, if I have one, is probably fourfold:

Firstly there is no denying that Ian Watkins is a very sick man who has committed and planned to commit some horrific acts and will hopefully never see the light of day again.

Secondly Ian Watkins and the women involved are responsible, not Lee Gaze, Mike Lewis, Jamie Oliver or any of the other former members. Yes, they made some shitty music and looked like they spent more time on their hair than practising their instruments but they are not guilty.
Neither is H from Steps for that matter you pricks.

Thirdly the rock scene is not a community.
It is not the community we are lead to believe it is.
Bands should protect themselves from being put in the position where they are accused. Bands should have a responsibility to their fan base not to take advantage and abuse them. Fans should have some respect. Your self esteem won't improve by fucking the singer - especially if he pisses on you afterwards and calls you a slut. Parents/friends, I know rock and roll is about rebellion but maybe you ought to preserve childhood a bit, look after yourselves/your kids a bit more.
Don't place yourself in that position.

And finally and most importantly there are two more victims of abuse in the world.
It could be argued this could have been prevented, but it wasn't. It's too late for that.
What remains now is to hope that they remain unscarred by the knowledge of this saga - physically and mentally - so it is paramount for their sake that they are protected and stupid shit like people publishing the names of their scumbag mothers to the world WILL ONLY DO THEM MORE DAMAGE YOU HEAR PEACHES GELDOF, YOU STUPID BITCH?
One hopes that the comedown off Crystal Meth and into the terrible shame of what they have been part of haunts them for the rest of their miserable lives.

It's a saddening, shameful and disgusting saga that should stand as a reminder to all that the fame game is a dangerous one and Watkins who once won hearts and minds for being clean cut ended up boxed on Cocaine and Crystal Meth chasing darker and darker sexual highs and abusing his position as a superstar.
Don't believe the hype kids.

2013: The year that wasn't.

So nothing has happened this year right?
I mean it's been nearly 12 months free of vitriol and snarky comments about something I profess to love so what has happened?
Well in no particular order of importance:

Lamb of God's Randy Blythe kicked off the year with the threat of 10 years in a Czech prison hanging over his head.

Slayer maestro Jeff Hanneman succumbed to liver failure and died possibly exacerbated by the lay off whilst he recovered from the flesh eating disease contracted by a spider bite two years ago.



More generally shit rhythm section news and former Iron Maiden drummer Clive Burr passed away this year.
Burr who played on the first three albums by the band had long been suffering from MS and died peacefully in sleep.
A sad time indeed and his former band who had supported him since his illness over whelmed him with a trust and several benefit gigs were understandably quick to issue their sadness at his passing.
Burr whose hard hitting and energetic style is often referred to as Maiden's greatest drummer, despite Nicko McBrain being the superior stick man technically, for the feel and punky style that he brought to numbers such as Running Free, The Prisoner, Run To The Hills etc.
Having played those first three albums a lot at the time it is a reminder that the East End band would not have sounded the way they did without Clive's incredible contribution.
Tributes poured in from all over the Rock world as musicians and fans influenced by the man's drumming paid homage to a man who in spite of suffering a terrible illness still retained his love of music, humour and irreverence until the end.
R.I.P Clive - your contribution to Iron Maiden can never be forgotten.

Then Adam Duce was fired from Machine Head.
In a heartfelt statement from Robb Flynn on the band's website he explained why Adam had to go and it broke my heart to hear of how the two friends had drifted apart and how Duce had effectively been struggling in Machine Head for years.
To be honest it was no great shock to learn this - Flynn and Duce have made no secret of their relationship difficulties over the last decade and being a road band has clearly taken it's toll.
Much like Maiden's Steve Harris you do feel though with Flynn that you get on board or get off.
He is now the only original member left, although he has always been it's heart and soul.
A shame though for sure as Duce's baselines on I'm Your God Now remains one of my all time favourites. He was replaced by some dude called Jared MacEachern who was in a band called Sanctity (no idea either but they were signed to Roadrunner for five minutes) and got the nod for his ability to hit the vocal harmonies. The jury is out for me.

After a triumphant UK tour drummer Joey LaCaze of Eyehategod passed away from respiratory failure at 42.

Deftones bassist Chi Cheng finally slipped away after a painful (for the fans) few years where he had remained in a state of semi conscious coma.

Legendary Door keyboardist and band leader Ray Manzerick also passed away.

On a non musical front, Tony Soprano, the James Gandolfini died of a heart attack at just 51. In the words of the big man himself:
“It's good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that and I know. But lately, I'm getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over.”
Not a good year for the dead pool.

The as if things weren't looking sucky enough, Slayer Skinbeater Dave Lombardo was fired, asked to sit out, decided to sit out, future endeavoured, whatever, by Kerry King and the cardboard cut out currently standing in for Tom Araya. As it turns out when Lombardo returned to Slayer he was not brought back in as a partner but as a player who received 5% of profits. Having returned from the World Painted Blood, Big Four extended jaunts Dave felt his pocket was a bit light and asked where the money his 5% was coming from was… You know if he was getting 5%, then how much was 100%?
Turns out not to be a question to ask and Dave has headed for the unemployment line whilst former Slayer stand in Paul Bosteph rejoined the band.
All in all, with Kings seeming lack of compassion towards the hole vacated by Hanneman, it has been a massive year of PR black marks for the thrash titans.

On no less a sad note Lou Reed also passed away, cue an outpouring of ignorant shit from vitriolic metal heads still angry over Lulu.
Make no mistake, I'm still angry over Lulu, but it is what it is - Lou Reed was a legend years before he became a ballsack faced rambling old git - there is no need to rag on a man now he is dead. Metallica on the other hand are quite capable of ruining themselves as this years self indulgent, time wasting excuse not to make decent music surfaced in the form of 3D concert movie Through The Never; a nonsensical blend of surrealist movie script and overly produced live footage that the band paid for from their own pocket and is currently tanking in Imax cinemas all over the globe.

Then there is the sad affair of Stone Temple Pilots.
The band fired Welland for being an unpredictable junkie liability.
Welland then alleged that they couldn't fire him and sued them. They sued him for loss of earnings and round and round it went with each side sniping at each other and doing everything but making music.
Until bizarrely STP surfaced with an EP featuring one Chester Bennington of former Nu Metal behemoths and chart bothering soundtrack machine Linkin Park. Clearly bored of waiting to see how windmill armed 'rapper' Mike Shinoda can piss off their remaining fan base he decided to go and actually sing on a record by a rock band. The results aren't spectacular but they are better than the last STP album and every Linkin Park release since Meteroa.

Recently Download popped out the blocks and finally sold it's soul down the river by announcing headlining acts of Avenged Sevenfold, er, Linkin Park and Aerosmith, backed by the talents of Rob Zombie, Fall Out Boy and Alterbridge. As the usual butthurt comments came crashing in one shining light emerged - A massively misjudged comment on social media of 'Why not Dying Foetus?' gathered so much momentum in a slightly ironic way that the undoubtably bemused American Death metal band find themselves on the Download bill.

Potentially vile human filth Ian Watkins has a date set for his baby raping trial - the extended fallout of this has inevitably done for the career of Lost Prophets, who split this year.

And finally in one of the strangest episodes Tim Lambesis of Christian tagged metalcore giants As I Lay Dying was arrested for attempting to hire a hit man to kill his wife.
Yeah… Lambesis apparently turned his back on his invisible friend and took to the gym and began abusing steroids, lifting weights, having affairs and generally pissing her indoors off.
After having had enough of his increasingly douchebagish behaviour she filed for divorce, a settlement which would undoubtedly take a sizeable chunk of his livelihood and the former God Bothering Austrian Death Machine singer was caught giving money to an undercover officer and asking him to kill his wife.
Seriously.
The trial is pending.

So that's why I haven't written much this year.
When the entire genre seems to crumble or turn into a surreal day in TMZ world I felt it was better to step off for my own sanity and yours dear reader. If I was sick of writing it, then you must be sick of reading it.

So why am I back?
Because sometimes you can get weighed down with the shitty things that happen and ignore the good.
Good things happened this year and in what has been dark days it is worth reminding people of them:

First off Randy Blythe is a free man. Acquitted of manslaughter the singer who had taken the brave step to return to the Czech Republic and face trial to clear his name was vindicated when the jury returned a not guilty verdict meaning that Lamb of God were free to resume business. With nearly a years earnings lost and the band and personnel near bankrupted by the process to clear their singers name they have immediately hit the road for the continuation of the Resolution tour; reminding people that at the beginning of last year they did actually release an awesome album.
In several incredibly powerful and mature statements Blythe sky rocketed in respect in the metal community as he asked people to remember the fact a young man tragically lost his life.
Randy's writings can be found on his instagram account and portray a very different person to the one who gets knocked out on their Killadelphia DVD - I urge you check out some of it as it is inspiring and moving stuff.

Kirk Windstein left Down.
I appreciate how that sounds, but for me Down have been growing stale for a while now, the Purple EP was churned out by a band who admittedly they were lazy and with Phil Anselmo much more caught up in his solo work, his record label, his horror house etc all I see Down doing at the moment is holding up great bands like Crowbar, Eyehategod and Corrosion of Conformity.
CoC have of course continued with the pre-Pepper line up and that is one thing, not my favourite era of the band, but you have to sympathise with Mullin and Dean for not just sitting around waiting for their famous guitarist to grow tired of hanging around with his celebrity mates.
Eyehategod having gone through tragedy actually have a new album in the can and from the 3 songs I have heard it will be up there with their best, however with Corrections House (awesome side project involving Mike IX Williams and Scott Kelly of Neurosis) just having release their debut and Jimmy Bower involved in writing the new Down EP you just know it is going to be a while before that surfaces.
Which leaves Crowbar. Now Crowbar is Windstiein. No Kirk, no Crowbar and for me their last album Sever The Wicked Hand was one of the best releases of their career and much better than the last three Down releases.
The opportunity for more Southern Sludge is a very exciting prospect.

British extreme metal legends Carcass returned (okay they returned to the scene a while back) with a new album in the fine shape of Surgical Steel; a stunning precision blow to the skull, back with all their gore soaked glory.

Elsewhere my boy Tristan Shone of Author & Punisher fame released the bold Women & Children album and toured the UK. On the back of this he picked up the opportunity to go out and support none other than Philip H Anselmo as he took his solo project on the road in the states.

And any year you get to see Iron Maiden and Alice In Chains twice can't be bad right?

If you want to know where I have really been hiding then as always I suggest you head on over to The Sleeping Shaman where I have produced over four pages of positive reviews this year which would suggest in a moment of maturity I have figured if you have nothing good to say then don't say it at all.

That said I feel I'll be back before the year is out with a round up of what I thought rocked and what didn't so prepared to be offended.
Peace out.
Or something.